The Almighty Sprug: Gulliver's Eyewitness Account of the Quaint Economy of Lilliput Page 6

circulation to pay off the loans from the Anointed, and the emperor couldn’t issue more without compromising faith in the Sprug and raising prices, and, as this terrifying news sunk in, production in that field would stop and the tiny people, now deep in debt, would sink into a deep depression thoroughly ashamed of their “fiscal insanity.”

  Ongoing Public Credit Bubble: On the other hand, in order to pay for any benefits for the poor or the elderly – like health care or old age pensions or building roads and etc. – Emperors had to keep a Public Credit Bubble going all the time. They couldn’t issue Sprugs for benefits for peasants, because this would not benefit the Anointed, and they believed it would undermine faith in the Sprug.

  So the emperors would borrow Sprugs from the Anointed to create public benefits, pay the Anointed interest, and promise to repay the loan sometime in the future. Of course, since there were wars and public needs all the time, emperors had to keep borrowing and the Public Credit Bubble kept growing. While I was there the interest on the loans payable to the Anointed to create public benefits amounted to about half of all the income of the government and was growing.

  The High Heels, of course, were always complaining about the “creeping” debt, but they battled any rise in taxes on the Anointed to slow the creeping. They insisted, instead, that government stop spending on benefits to the peasants, and use the Sprugs saved to pay the Anointed creditors. But because High Heels kept cutting taxes on the Anointed, the Public Credit Bubble tended to increase even when they were in office.

  The Low Heels also complained about the “creeping” Public Credit Bubble, and would sometimes manage to increase taxes on the Anointed to slow its growth. But, no sooner had they done so, than they’d discover some new social benefit needed that, because the High Heels fought raising taxes, required increasing the Public Debt. So the Public Credit Bubble kept growing, and, since nobody knew how to stop it, the little people usually left it to future generations to solve the problem.

  Ultimately, a future generation reduced to grinding servitude paying the interest on the debt to the Anointed, would turn to the All Heels to solve the problem. The All Heels always demanding dictatorial power would raise taxes, rob or kill the Anointed and turn over the Sprugs to a Central Committee; cancel the debt payable to the Anointed, and close their gambling casino.

  Unfortunately, controlling the raw and unlimited power of the Sprugs taken from the Anointed would quickly corrupt the Central Committee, and, worse, unable to interpret the wishes of the “invisible hand,” would ultimately run Lilliput’s economy on to the rocks, and the Lilliputians would have to call in the High Heels to “privatize” the economy and return control to the Anointed and the whole cycle would start again.

  But, as I mentioned before, these three exceptional times show that, whenever the little people ignored faith in the Sprug and rising prices, and just unleashed their economy, they had the resources to recreate their Garden of Eden. But, whenever faced with a decision whether to unleash production or protect faith in the Sprug, ultimately they would always chose to protect faith in the Sprug and reduce production. They believed they could live with unemployment and poverty, but they couldn’t live without the emotional thrill of using the raw imperial power of the Sprug.

  VI

  The Crime and

  Corruption Problem

  The Gospel according to Saint Adam as adopted by the High Heels was that the “invisible hand” only anointed competent people to carry out its wishes and that any incompetents that happened to gain Sprug power would soon be eliminated or “corrected” by a mysterious “market force.” Thus the High Heels were against any government interference or regulation of the economy.

  The Gospel according to Saint Karl and Saint Vladimir adopted by the Low Heels and the All Heels was that using the raw and unlimited imperial power of the Sprug tended to corrupt even good people; and that it was necessary for government to interfere and regulate the Anointed to be sure something “trickled down” to society. To support this view, the Low Heels and All Heels were always noting how the Anointed fell into three categories of perfection:

  The Angels: This was a class of clever people who used their Sprug power in valuable ways that benefited society. They organized and ran productive factories, invented productive goods and services, paid taxes, took pride in their leadership, got very rich and powerful, and, retaining some vestige of compassion, saw to it that some benefits “trickled down” to the peasantry. The High Heels would always parade these fellows before the people as shining examples of the Anointed.

  The Devils: This was also a class of clever people anointed by the “invisible hand” that took pride in their work, and were good managers, organizers, and inventors. However, this group of Anointed dealt in illegal products and services, and lacked any vestige of compassion or interest in the health of the rest of society. They varied from individual cut purses to vast organizations that robbed, cheated, kidnapped, and killed other people to gain Sprugs.

  Interesting enough the organized Devils tended to “trickle down” as much benefits to society as the organized Angels. They provided jobs for farmers growing illegal substances, spent large sums as bribes to bolster the salaries of local and national officials and police, paid “hush money” to citizens of many towns, paid great salaries to their workers, and were very popular with their customers.

  Even more interesting, a large part of the people on Lilliput considered the Devils heroes. One of the longest running plays in Lilliput was about The Baritones, a family of Devils that fascinated audiences with their illegal exploits. The tiny people tended to ignore their evil manners, and admire the Devil’s ability to accumulate Sprugs and manipulate society. The Lilliputians seemed to see something of themselves in the Devils.

  The Fops: These people made up the largest category of Anointed. Usually inheriting their Sprugs, or winning them gambling in the casino, some Fops had the ability to interpret the will of the “invisible hand” to become Angels or Devils. However, most Fops did not have that ability, and generally used their Sprug power to clog up Lilliput’s economy with worthless projects and incompetence. Their projects were forever ending in bankruptcy, taking with them innocent people dealing with them.

  Saint Adam and the High Heels flat out denied that useless Fops existed. They insisted that all those Anointed by the “invisible hand” were good, and that all were important in leading Lilliput into the best of all possible worlds. Following the advice of Saint Adam, the High Heels were categorically opposed to any limitation or taxation of anyone who became rich and powerful.

  Just before I left Lilliput, the Low Heels, confused over how the “invisible Hand” could have chosen the Fops to direct Lilliput’s economy, were totally ineffective. However, the All Heels, pointing out that 80% of all the Sprugs on Lilliput were controlled by just 4% of the population, most of whom were Fops, had begun arguing that it was again time to elect All Heels and systematically clean the economy.

  The All Heels promised, if given power, they would rob and kill the Devils and Fops and redistribute their Sprugs, and cancel all Public Debt owed to them. But, while I was there, the argument still generally fell on deaf ears for most Lilliputians were still hoping to accumulate some of the raw and unlimited Sprug power and become Fops themselves, and weren’t interested in making waves for the benefit of a minority.

 

  THE DUAL ECONOMY; Let me be quick to report that the Lilliputians knew that handling raw power tended to corrupt. They’d already limited the power of the Anointed of their Heavenly God and politicians to limit religious and political corruption. But most Lilliputians so enjoyed using the raw power of The Almighty Sprug that in almost all cases they didn’t want to limit economic power.

  However, the Lilliputians were no fools. They knew that, to survive, certain vital areas of the economy had to be kept clear of the corrupting influence of the raw power of the Sprug. Even the Anointed absolutely forbid the use of Sprug
s as a medium of exchange within the different departments of their businesses because of its corrupting influence.

  So, within all vital private, public, and military organizations the Lilliputians insisted that members conduct business using their sense of pride in their work, their sense of duty to the Anointed owners or the public or the nation, and operate on well organized cooperation and mutual trust. Anyone caught buying and selling any goods or ideas for Sprugs within vital economic organizations was preemptively fired, and even criminally prosecuted

  Parliament was the only exception to this rule, for the Supremes ruled that, since Lilliput was an economic theocracy, the Anointed of the “invisible hand” of the Sprug should be free to influence members of Parliament. So Lilliput’s Parliament was not classified as a vital area and its members were free to sell their votes for Sprugs, and, thus, the Anointed controlled Lilliputian politics as well as the Lilliputian economy.

  So I found the little people practiced duplicity in two different ways: They limited the power of their political and church leaders, but not the power of their economic leaders – and they divided economic behavior into vital